James Dean believed that while 'we should dream as if we'll live forever, we should live as if we'll die today.'  Ironically, Mr. Dean's life was in fact too short, but those who have been inspired by his life make note of the fact that he actually followed his own advice and viewed life as a gift, making the most out of every moment he was given.

In the same vein, as we gain solid footing in the summer season, we are reminded of how important it is to identify the opportunities it presents, and how critically important it is to seize the moment.  Much like if you were growing fruit in your garden, after all the work and waiting, the time will come when you must pick it and enjoy, otherwise it will all go to waste. This, indeed, is a central tenet for Skillful Living.

Literally and metaphorically speaking, what we have in front of us now is a garden full of ripe berries which we've been dutifully tending to all year long.  If you look back, in the fall, we pruned the branches and put the plants to bed, letting go of the old; in the winter, we left things alone allowing them to rest, suspending judgment and honoring the stillness; and in the spring, we prayed with our hearts for the sustenance of the elements of sun and water to work their magic, appreciating the nature of renewal and looking forward to new growth. Now, with the sun nearing its peak, it is both our obligation and delight to bask in its warm embrace and use its energy to sustain us. 

At this moment, life's pace speeds up, and excitement brews. And while we must be careful to effectively dismiss hesitation and pick the ripe fruit we must also maintain the proper balance and limit any tendency to become overly impulsive or precipitous. We cannot rush the process more than we can hold onto it. Ultimately, there is a rhythm and flow that we must align with in order to make the most of our time. 

Please share your thoughts...  

Question:  I'm at a crossroad in my life and facing a big decision. In the past, I have often relied on a friend-a mentor of sorts-to help me through situations like this. However, this is a matter involving feelings that are deeper than I have ever shared before and am not sure that going to him is the right thing at this point. Similarly, even requesting your counsel poses a challenge since I have a tendency to be easily influenced by the opinions of others, and I would hate to be swayed beyond measure by your response. I have the sense that I need to take charge of this one. Is there is any advice you can offer me that will make this process easier?

Answer:  Thank you for confiding in me enough to even broach the subject. Respecting your need for autonomy, I want to first acknowledge that I'm glad you weren't more specific on the details of your predicament. Indeed, I think I might be able to be more effective if I simply walked you through the nature of how we process information to make decisions.

Essentially there are four routes.

The first is to defer the decision to someone else. This is what you might have been alluding to when you mentioned your friend and even how swayed you could potentially be by my advice directly. In general, when we defer decisions, we abrogate responsibility of the outcome. This only works for things that don't matter. I don't get the sense that this applies now. I thus commend you for your ability to identify the reality that somebody's condemnation or approval can have a sizeable effect on your decisions.  That in itself is a brave and insightful admission.

The second route would be one that might be called impulsive by some, and reckless by others. Here too, this is rarely the wisest choice. Though eventually we need to take a leap of faith in almost every situation, there is great value in more seriously contemplating a decision that has as far reaching implications as it appears this one does for you.

The third route is to collect more information and play out all the possible scenarios. While this may initially seem like an attractive option, and while it is true that some processing is usually warranted, without care, one can over analyze a matter to the point of indecision.

This leaves the fourth and final route--a combination of all of the above and the application of a specific technique to integrate them which I'd call intuition for the lack of a better word. Here I mean tapping into a deep feeling state that connects you to your collective experience and wisdom. Ultimately, one needs to cultivate this capacity as it involves trusting yourself. However, there is no better way to proceed and only through our trials (including our "successes and failures") can we hone this skill.

You might then ask, (especially if do have difficulty trusting yourself,) how you can take such a risk. Here is the key---reframe the concept of a mistake, and understand that every experience, and indeed every challenge, is an opportunity for growth. With that in mind, mistakes are all relative.

At this moment, then, I'd like for you to examine how this all works together. First, play your situation out mentally, exploring the plausible outcomes of the various options and register your feelings with each of them.  What do these potential decisions feel like...do you inexplicably feel "right" or "wrong" about any of them?  What is the basis for your expectations; are you attached to any specific outcomes? Are you in any kind of denial?  Double check your motives, as well as what you stand to gain and lose either way, but try not to over-think.  I am willing to bet that the "right" decision is the one that will keep reappearing. Indeed, it might appear somewhere other than in your head, i.e. your gut. If that is the case, it might take a leap of faith to follow it, requiring you to go around the voices that are not your own. 

Utilize your feelings and experiences and incorporate them into your stream of awareness allowing yourself, as well, to incorporate the thoughts of those who have your best interest at heart and can contribute something valuable to your deliberation. At this point, using others is not the same as deferment, but be careful here if you feel vulnerable.

Finally, as informed or confident as you may be in your decision once you've made it, remember that regardless of whatever precautions are taken, sometimes things simply do not work out as planned...so be able to go with the flow once your decision is made.  Stand by it, even if the outcome turns out to be unexpected, even unfavorable. Ultimately, the quality of our lives is not entirely dependent on how good our decisions are, but about how we live with them. In the end, if you have learned something, you have made progress.  Don't second guess yourself or look back. And don't forget, to enjoy the fruit.

Please submit your own question here.

·         This Saturday I will be hosting my first guest from the "Listener's Circle." Renee Pisarz will share her personal story of awakening after the tragic death of her 18 year old son. Renee is the author of a mini-book, titled, Angel 54: A Mother's Sacred Journey from Grief to Healing. Indeed this will be a profound show on the subject of healing grief, one that we can all relate.

·         On Saturday, June 11^th, I will be joined by Master Herbalist and author of Gentle Healing for Baby and Child, Andrea Candee, who will discuss chronic Lyme disease and alternative methods of treating it.

·         On Saturday, June 18^th, my friend Marianne Denniston will return to speak to us about the powerful healing potential of the Tibetan Bowls and offer a "sound experience" on air.

• The next Group Juice Fast I will be hosting will begin on Monday, June 13^th at SunRaven. The 8 day program will conclude on, the first day of summer, Tuesday June 21^st.  If you have been thinking about undertaking a true "cleanse" or detox, a green juice fast along with a comprehensive protocol developed by one of the leading experts in the field can be an extremely valuable experience.  The SunRaven Juice Fast is unique in that it offers the support from a group of participants who share this interest and live in the same community, as well as my personal guidance and participation. If you have any questions, send an email to: juicefast@sunraven.org.

• Coinciding with the next Group Juice Fast, Warren Falcon and I will be leading an introductory workshop on the Power of Dreams and initiate the SunRaven Mid-Summer's Night Dream Group. The first meeting will take place on Friday June 17^th. For more information send an email to michael@sunraven.org.

• On Saturday, June 18th, I will be hosting the first "Summer Solstice Celebration at SunRaven," featuring sacred music, isnging and dancing, with Sharada Wen and Friends.  To pre-register for the festivities on the bountiful SunRaven lawn or for more information, Advance tickets are $15, ($20 on the day of the event.) email: michael@sunraven.org 

• Coming up, I will be recording a lecture with the Learning Annex about detox and juicing.  Stay tuned for more information as dates of availability become available. 

FINALLY! A New Thought for the New Moon